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Spotting phonies
Just say no to chameleon candidates! Are you nervous around black people? (Do you poop out at parties? Well, DO YOU?! — Lucy Ricardo) Not in the sense of fearing your purse gets swiped (like that hilarious routine about the elevator). No, my Wonder Breads, you worry your black acquaintance won’t accept you for who you really are, that they can’t see past your guilty white epidermis. That, instead, they blame you for Bull Connors and Nipsey Russell. So you go out of your way to ingratiate. Let drop that you would have marched with Father Groppi back in…
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Put the kid in the game
We want more Isaac! Seated front row before the flickering b&w Philco, the Head Groundskeeper whooped and hollered when UW Badger basketball coach Greg Gard’s kid drained that 3-pointer Wednesday. Guessing you could hear Madison cheering all the way to Rockford. The game was already well in hand; the Badgers were blowing out the Maryland crab cake eaters when fans at the Kohl Center began chanting “We want Isaac.” Coach’s kid is always the last sub off the bench, lucky to get 30 seconds on the floor — and then only when his team has a mathematically insurmountable lead…
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More Woke Racism from The Capital Times
Progressives need victims! Mars needs women! My former employer is saying the quiet part out loud: that the WI Institute for Law & Liberty is racist. The emeritus editor of The Capital Times accuses the pro-bono conservative law firm of “[using] anti-racist policies for a racist cause:” With generous tax deductible funding from the right-wing Bradley Foundation of Milwaukee, the Wisconsin Institute for Law and Liberty — W.I.L.L. for short — has been successful in using those laws to allege discrimination against white people. Note the whiff of partisan brimstone! (Not that The Capital Times doesn’t offload some of…
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How do you know? Do you do a count?
“Okay! But are ya sure? ‘Cause I mean, how do you know? Do you do a count? Or what kind of a routine do you have here?” — Sheriff Marge Gunderson questioning new car sales manager Jerry Lundegaard Grifters, many of them Somali immigrants, have stolen at least $9 Billion in taxpayer money in bogus social welfare scams right out from under the nose of Minnesota Gov. Tim Walz, the Democrats’ most recent nominee for vice president of the USA. A state audit blamed “inadequate oversight” by Minnesota government. Prosecutors claimed that although state agencies held ultimate power, Feeding…
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War! What is it good for?
How about Peace in the Middle East? Say it, say it, say it again! We defer matters above our pay grade to columnist Bret Stephens, token conservative at the New York Times, who neatly expresses this registered voter’s opinion. “Everyone is joyful; it is one of the best days of probably 95 percent of Iranians’ lives,” one Iranian resident of the city of Karaj [said] about Khamenei’s death. … There was a time when American hearts could be moved by moments like these — when free nations, having endured years of provocations and attacks from tyrants, band together to…
Wife in Cart
Blaska Policy Werkes
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WOOORKKK!
A ferocious work ethic was a virtue among our elders; today it’s evidence of systemic injustice. If only those tireless, uncomplaining parents and grandparents had been given more help from the government, they wouldn’t have had to make the sacrifices for which their children, now successful politicians, praise them. — Barton Swaim, Wall St. Journal
Lemme see some I.D.
Mayor Mamdani is requiring 5 forms of ID to shovel New York City out of record snow. — NY Post
Six Big Ten football teams made The Athletic’s ranking of the top 25 transfer portal classes. Wisconsin was one of them!
Today’s Laff Riot!
Right now in America there are protesters protesting the death of a man who murdered protesters for protesting.
Governor Pritzker is so toxic even the Chicago Bears want to leave Illinois.