Hugo Chavez jiggered Ol’ Sparky!

We demand primary results be decertified! 

The Head Groundskeeper is getting with the program. No more will we accept defeat gracefully. Got only three of six correct in the great Blaska-goolie’s Republican primary election predictions. We blame The Deep State for our dismal showing. 

Only Trump-backed Mike Gableman had worse luck picking winners, he having picked the opponent of the Assembly Speaker who hired him and now will fire him. We would fire Hugo Chavez for short-circuiting the computer’s Al Gore Rhythms if he were still around. Trump-backed Sydney Powell is on the case. 

Should have suspected the big fix was in when Ol’ Sparky, our Eisenhower-era mainframe computer, refused to accept punch cards unless they were punched in Spanish. Explains why we whiffed on three of the six races. This blogge’s platinum subscribers did no better. Few picked Tim Michels to win. 

Only one subscriber out of 64 entrants got all the races correct but our incompetent North Korean programmers neglected to ask for entrant names. All we can say is if you made your prediction at 6:57 p..m. on 08-02-22, C’mon down! 

	Actual Vote	Blaska predict	Readers predict
Governor (of 4)
Tim Michels ✔︎	47.2%	44%	1.80
Rebecca Kleefisch (B)	42.0%	46%	1.61
Tim Ramthun	6.0%	9%	3.06
Lt. Governor (of 8)
Roger Roth ✔︎	30.1%	28%	2.83
Patrick Testin (B)	18.3%	30%	1.50
Jonathan Wichman	13.3%	x	7.61
Will Martin	9.2%	x	2.66
Attorney General (of 3)
Eric Toney ✔︎ (B)	37.5%	43%	1.58
Adam Jarchow	36.9%	42%	1.83
Karen Mueller	25.6%	15%	2.59
Secretary State (of 3)
Amy Loudenbeck ✔︎ (B)	46.3%	55%	1.36
Jay Schroeder	13.9%	40%	1.89
Congress (of 2)
Erik Olson ✔︎	50.1%	30%	x
Charity Barry (B)	49.9%	70%	x
Assembly (of 2)
Robin Vos ✔︎ (B)	51.3%	60%	1.11
Adam Steen	48.7%	40%	1.89

✔︎ Winner. (B) Blaska pick to win. X Blaska did not predict or did not include on subscriber poll. Reader Pick numbers range from 1 (for first place) to 3, 4, or 8 depending on number of candidates.

Who(m) do YOU blame for our incompetence?