Your Werkes booster blogge!
To combat the Omicron variant, President Joe Biden is going to make 500 million at-home COVID-19 test kits available for free starting next month.
In the rapidly evaporating spirt of Christmas just past, you can have mine. No need to thank. It’s another benefit for you platinum-level subscribers to the Werkes, the daytime, sniffling, sneezing, aching, coughing, stuffy-head, fever, so you can think blogge.
The indentured servants at the Stately Manor are not vaxx deniers. We’ve got two doses of mint chocolate Moderna surging through our veins plus a booster. Three more and we get a free pizza and webbed feet. It’s just that we gave up self-flagellation for Lent. Why stick a cotton swab up your schnoz if you’re feeling in fine fettle?
Omicron symptoms said to be sore throat, runny nose, fever, and muscle aches. Sounds like a cocktail of NyQuil and Absolut should be the quicker fixer-upper. From what the grey lab coats can determine, a dry cough and loss of taste and smell distinguish Covid from the run o’ the mill flu, against which we’re also vaccinated. (Also, shingles, tetanus, and Woke progressivism.)
Consider also that you may have Covid but not know it because you don’t have symptoms. And that the home test kits aren’t all that accurate, anyway (it sez here).
Do you hear what I hear? No, it’s not the night wind to the little lamb. It’s the bleating of Chicken Little, sure that the sky will fall if we don’t increase carbon taxes. It is whining, “Blaska, have you no heart? Aren’t you worried about spreading the crud to someone who isn’t vaccinated?”
Blaska’s Bottom Line: Just because we don’t wear our heart on our sleeve doesn’t mean we don’t use it on occasion. This is not one of those occasions. You don’t want to vaxx, don’t axx. Besides, can’t get the swab up our schnozes past this damned mask.