Tom Tiffany should put the rock back on campus

And absolve Chamberlin Rock of racism!

Whaddaya think of this idea: A TV spot that will put Tom Tiffany over the top in November (pending midnight thumb drives in Milwaukee)! Spot opens with my man standing next to the Chamberlin Rock, more massive than the Deep State conspiracy.  

“Hi, I’m Tom Tiffany. I promise you one thing: as your next governor, I won’t do stupid. Five years ago, our great state university removed this 42-ton boulder from its Madison campus.” 

Camera pulls out to reveal the noble stone imprisoned behind a chain link fence at a storage site north of Stoughton.

“It had sat on Observatory Hill for 12,000 years — ever since a glacier deposited it there in the last ice age. Generations of geology students studied it.” 

Archival video shows construction cranes removing the boulder from campus.

“Why was it removed? Because WOKE stupidity took over the university. A small group of student activists actually accused the rock of racism! An inanimate stone!”

Video of the rock being hauled away:

“While crews were banishing the supposedly racist rock, the campus czar of Woke activism:
•  gave himself a $50,000 pay raise, 
• treated his staff to conferences on the Hawaiian island of Maui, 
• spent $18,000 on student massages, $4,000 for Crocs shoes, and $3,000 for beanie hats.” 

Camera close-up of the Republican candidate:

“Our state college campuses from Superior to Parkside are infested with $22 million worth of Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion czars, some of them making hundreds of thousands of dollars a year. Not teaching history or geology. But teaching guilt and grievance. Like accusing a 42-ton glacial boulder of racism.”

Camera pulls back.

“As your next governor, I’ll put an end to teaching stupid. I’ll put Chamberlin Rock back where the Ice Age put it.”

→ Seven in ten Americans in October 2025 said higher education is going in the wrong direction — Pew Research Center

Blaska’s Bottom Line: Makes a political construct — Wokeness — into something tactile while under-scoring its essential absurdity. Appeals to tuition-stressed parents. Draws a contrast with his Democrat(ic) opponent. (David Crowley is on record saying “equity-based efforts … is how we utilize the data to target resources.”) Piggybacks on the constitutional amendment on the November ballot that bans government from granting preferential treatment based on identity politics.

What do YOU think?