Expensive jelly awaits fly-in visitors to the Werkes

(No, we will not comment on a certain CNN town hall)

We’re expecting special visitors at the Experimental Work Farm (and Penal Colony) today. Gaily colored and finely feathered visitors. Millions of them across Wisconsin, according to the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel are expected this very day!

Birds that migrated thousands of miles from Central and South America. Fleeing hardship and seeking opportunity, no doubt, but here legally just the same! They were just in Missouri and Arkansas Thursday, according to a University of Wisconsin bird expert. Southwest Airlines, take note!

Promised you a better picture; here’s Mr. Oriole at dinner time

Orioles, ruby-throated hummingbirds, warblers and flycatchers coming to the Emerald City. The Werkes beat the bird professor’s timetable, thanks to a Birds Choice™️ oriole feeder we purchased for the princely sum of $55! The birdman at Wild Birds Unlimited in Middleton WI (he had a tiny beak) said the responsible birder must never stock the feeder with common breakfast jelly. Oh no! Corn fructose sweetener is bad for birds. Stock your new oriole feeder with all-natural BirdBerry Jelly™️, he advised. It is “a unique mixture of grape and blackberry.” At $7.49 for a 20-ounce squeeze jar, the Head Groundskeeper is squirting some on his breakfast toast!

Anyway, enough of the grousing (if you’ll pardon our pun). Within a half hour of stocking the Birds Choice™️ oriole feeder with the special jelly and two halves of a mandarin orange, a real-life oriole came to visit at 1:30 p.m. Wednesday 05-10-23!  That’s what we call results!

→ Saturday is World Migratory Bird Day

Blaska’s Bottom Line: Three humming bird feeders await their first hummer. We would like to see more bees and butterflies this year. It’s been at least a dozen years since bats enlivened our evenings. No longer use herbicides on the lawn. We keep Enzo the magnificent-cat indoors and planted plenty of pollinators, especially monarda. So it’s NOT OUR FAULT!

What are YOU expecting today?


About David Blaska

Madison WI
This entry was posted in Experimental Work Farm, Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

11 Responses to Expensive jelly awaits fly-in visitors to the Werkes

  1. Pingback: Expensive jelly awaits fly-in visitors to the Werkes – Wisconsin Family News

  2. pANTIFArts says:

    I happened to come across this:

    “I don’t eat four-legged animals, but I eat birds, I eat cheese, I eat dessert. I eat everything.”
    –Gwyneth Paltrow– (famous aficionado of birds, and designer jelly)

    I post this as a public service to you, as you form your guest lists for summer cook-outs. (no need to thank me) As long as the cat still has all 4 legs, he will be safe.

    Liked by 1 person

    • A Voice in the Wilderness says:

      Squire and the missus could invite Gwyneth as long as they keep her indoors with Enzo. It wouldn’t be much of a cookout for her if she had to eat her grilled veggi burgers and cheese inside, though.

      A “sconnie” she probably isn’t.

      A good actor she is.


  3. Cornelius_Gotchberg says:

    Orioles have been making a comeback in these here parts, as have the brilliantly colored Ruby Throated Grosbeaks, Goldfinches, Purple Finches, Scarlet Tanagers, and Indigo Buntings.

    All, and many more, have been welcome visitors to The Gotch’s Feathered Friend friendly backyard, replete with eight (8) each of bird feeders and bird baths, and beau coup shrubs-n-trees for nesting and safety.

    You should post this to Neighborsnextdoor (They Report/You Decide!) which has an annual spring bird watch thread.

    The Gotch


    • old baldy says:

      “Ruby Throated Grosbeaks” Surely you jest? Neither Robbins, Bruun and Zim (1966), nor Alsop (2001), show such a creature in their bird ID keys. Perhaps you were you too busy measuring your cucumbers or weighing your tomatoes to correctly identify the Rose-Breasted Grosbeak (Pheucticus ludovicianus)? Or did you confuse a grosbeak with a Ruby-Throated Hummingbird (Archilochus colubris)?


      • Cornelius_Gotchberg says:

        “Or did you confuse a grosbeak with a Ruby-Throated Hummingbird

        Sure did, and thank you.

        Yet the telling backstory is that the poor, flaccidly enfeebled hankdog/old baldy is attempting a comically inept GOTCHA.

        Why? He’s terminally singed because The Gotch has embarrassingly SCHOOLED HIM on so many occasions.

        As far as the identifying particulars of his (arguably) World Class Tomatoes-n-Cukes, do hunter/fishermen discuss the taste/nutritional content of what they bag/catch?

        Not exactly.

        But rank morons can’t make that connection.

        hankdog/old baldy can’t make that connection.

        Solve for X….

        The Gotch


        • old baldy says:

          Ah, the fragility of gootch and his ego. The connection you missed is that while you are quick to point out the foibles of those you disagree with by calling them names, slinging your juvenile insults, and aggressively poor spelling (and get the keyboard fixed), yet you cling to your own errors, lies, mistakes, and ignorance like they were your giant tomatoes.

          Too bad hankdog is no longer with us to see your stupid claims re bird life in your backyard. He was an expert.

          And you couldn’t school a carrot much less me.

          No go weigh/measure whatever makes you feel more manly.


        • Cornelius_Gotchberg says:

          “aggressively poor spelling.”

          Give examples of these misspellings, or waddle your over-sized @$$ back and issue an appropriately groveling and contrite apology for this egregious breach of a fact-based Reality.

          And The Gotch regularly, and with measured aplomb, SCHOOLS/b!tchslaps your empty-head into the cheap seats; he knows AND you know it!

          One more (heh!) thing.

          “No (sic) go weigh/measure whatever makes you feel more manly.


          The Gotch


  4. nemoofthenorth says:

    We’ve been feeding the feathered at the bar for years, but there’s growing trouble. I don’t know how it is by you Squire, but up here the squirrels are getting so huge that they are starting to bully the local deer and bear. Not even the threat of a high scoring game of “Squirrel Ball” can keep them off the feeders!


  5. westsidesue says:

    This column was an absolute delight to read. I hope you see many feathered friends and enjoy a great summer. Sometimes you show a side of yourself that is sooooo removed from the curmudgeon you normally portray. And a break from politics, especially lately is much-needed relief!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Us930894 says:

    Thanks for your postings. Something I look forward to daily.

    Liked by 1 person

Comments are closed.