More free stuff, mean Mr. Mustard, and a driver!

We’re sorry, but admission to Stately Blaska Manor is closed until further notice. The gracious home and imposing grounds (including the Experimental Work Farm) are under strict quarantine. The Squire and his Doyenne have taken ill with a malady known as The Creeping Crud!

Any reports that Blaska has gone totally KoKo Puffs is Fake News! But he is in an especially bad mood. Worse than normal. I blame the mainstream news media.

While he recovers, the white lab coats at the Policy Werkes and Tanning Salon issue these communiqués in his name.

Madison police — That a federal judge dropped the City of Madison from the lawsuit filed by the mother of Tony Terrell Robinson Jr. is huge. It means that the $400,000 study the Madison Common Council farmed out to a Berkeley head shop in response to his shooting (after he attacked a police officer) is so much incense and peppermints.

Why? Because the lawsuit didn’t even make the case that, in the words of U.S. Circuit Judge James Petersen, “the city turned a blind eye to obvious problems with the police department’s investigation or response to officer-involved shootings.” In other words: the Madison police department itself is not deficient.

Let that digest. Whatever claims the mother made that Madison Police treat officer shootings lightly were too unsubstantiated to be brought to trial. Unfortunately, Officer Kenny must stand trial — it’s a federal civil rights case, not a criminal case. The court has months of fact-finding, argument, case study, and deliberation — to second guess a decision that gave Officer Kenny mere seconds.

Hold the mustard — Can’t get a loan? Business model doesn’t cut the mustard? Spread too thin? We hear Dane County government is an easy touch. When did county government get into the loan business? Apparently eight years ago, which is when Dane County threw $200,000 at Barry Levinson for a mustard museum. A Mustard Museum! Guess what, mustard museums are not a big sell. A cute idea, maybe, but not $200,000 cute. So now taxpayers will have to eat $124,000 of the loan. Who made a mustard museum a priority?

Re-electing Donald Trump — Oh for the days of Leon Varjian and his Pail and Shovel Party! The late prankster reduced the student government budget into a pile of pennies, dumped them onto the mall and invited students to scoop up their loot with the sandbox pail and shovels provided. Today’s student government wants “free college” for black students. Free tuition, free housing, free everything.

This is wrong on every level. If America’s African-American population is hobbled, it is by government-encouraged dependence on the welfare state. So what’s the cure? More free stuff! The idea is racist to the core, violates federal law on its face, is not means tested, and demeans the supposed beneficiary.

Taxpayers are supposed to subsidize Don Lemon’s kids? How about if we just “identify” as black?

If these are the student leaders at Wisconsin’s flagship campus, then State Sen. Steve Nass has been too easy on the university system.

Give them credit — Didn’t think it possible a superintendent of public instruction race could be interesting. My condolences to State Journal reporter Molly Beck for trying to keep straight who offered what to whom and when. Reaffirms that education ought to be sitting at the governor’s cabinet table. The good government goo goos argue that our current system — electing an education czar independent of the governor on a nonpartisan ballot — takes the politics out of it.

Oh yeah? What do you call $150 grand a year AND a driver? Gimme politics every time.