How soon before Green New Deal bans farming?
The Head Groundskeeper maintains Stately Blaska Manor at a comfortable 72 degrees (when the Lovely Lisa isn’t turning the thermostat to a less comfortable 75). Early in our residence here on the SW side of Madison WI, the man of the house had to promise the wife that if she allowed him to install air conditioning, he would use it sparingly. Promises made, promises broken.
That was before corn sweat. Sounds like one of Joe Biden’s imaginary adversaries. No less an authority than Scientific American explains:
The heat is accompanied by humidity from two sources: moist air that is streaming up from the Gulf of Mexico and a phenomenon that is sometimes called “corn sweat.” The latter happens when corn, soybeans, and other crops release moisture as the temperature climbs. This process, known technically as evapo-transpiration, is akin to how humans perspire in the heat. Steamy contributions from those crops mean we can see some of our higher moisture values of the year at this time of year.
Indeed, the windows of the manor house were all steamed up this morning, proving a certain dew point beyond our ability to compute. Humidity this 27th day of August 2024 will approach Calcutta levels (before the city changed its name). Gin & tonic weather. The temp at noon today was 86 ℉ on its way toward a predicted high of 92 ℉. Humidity stood at 72%, the dew point at 76% for a heat index of 96 ℉ and climbing. (We don’t understand baseball’s Wins Over Replacement metric either.)
The problem:
The culprit:
Let’s see Progressive Dane fight THAT oppression!
Blaska’s Bottom Line: We recall from a certain Ken Burns series about the Dust Bowl that settlers once believed that rain followed the plow, until it didn’t. We also remember when science said don’t eat eggs, and that emptying out grade schools would save us from Covid, and that saving postage stamps would rescue little pagan babies. The little Green New Deal people already want to ban cows for farting. They’re replacing corn fields with acres of solar panels. As for the reputed phenomenon of “climate change,” we can only conclude that Everything is the Problem.
9 responses to “Corn sweat and cow farts”
We must stop this. It’s affecting climate change and is not acceptable. Neither is milking horses.
Doth the rainforest not sweat? And what of the greensward prairie grass, and the gentle prairie flower? Do they not evapo-transpire? Why doth the “GMO” and “Round-up Ready” stand alone in our scorn? Was the noble bison not prone to bouts of flatulence?
Like my ‘ol grand pappy would say, “I wouldn’t give that fool the sweat off my corn.” Except in Polish.
Stupid corn wouldn’t make it on Arrakis.
“Stupid corn wouldn’t make it on Arrakis.”
That’s because of the giant sand worms. 🪱
Except that consuming corn makes THEM fart, a true environmental disaster. Therefore they must go, as well. Will Utopia never be realized? (for fans of Sir Thomas More, “utopia” translates to “nowhere”, clever!)
If the 8.2 billion people on earth would just stop breathing the co2 levels will drop and the earth will be saved.
On this day in 1883, Krakatoa exploded in eruption, the most violent in all of recorded history. The effects were felt around the world. With a death toll in the tens of thousands, it easily dwarfs the death toll from cow farts, (if there is one).
Krakatoa reminds me of an uncle after the bean feed.