Don’t let this fall into the hands of the Iranians!

About David Blaska

Madison WI
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2 Responses to Don’t let this fall into the hands of the Iranians!

  1. pANTIFArts says:


    As a young boy I had a rabid interest in science, and I had ALL the “science kits”, (rocks, fossils, chemistry, etc.) So, it is “hypothetically possible” that one year I “might” have received the “Uncle Milton’s Ant Farm” along with the “Gilbert Atomic Energy Lab” for Christmas. (I can neither confirm, nor deny)

    I can neither confirm, nor deny, that in the proper proportions, Nestle’s Quik powder and the powder from cap-gun roll caps, when mixed with the Uranium 238 (supplied) will create the much more unstable isotope Uranium 235. (radioactive)

    I CAN confirm that ants LOVE Nestle’s Quik…….(and I mean really, REALLY love it)

    After 4 or 5 days I may, or may not, have gone through all the Uranium, two large boxes of Quik, and all of my caps (along with some powder from old shotgun shells). It is possible, at this point, that the hypothetical ants, IF they existed, may have been “quite large”. IF this were the case, then, unable to feed or contain them, my first impulse would have been to do what ALL Americans do with animals that have grown too large and dangerous to keep (ie:Turn Them Loose In South Florida) But Florida is well over 1,000 miles away, and I could only ride my bike in a six block radius of my house, so I MIGHT have set them free in the railroad yards behind my friend Odie’s house. (Can neither confirm, nor deny)

    How they got to New Mexico, and then L.A.? (if, indeed, that is what happened) — I don’t know.
    How did the Federal Agents find me? — Probably Odie’s younger sister, Carla (a legendary snitch)

    Hollywood made a some-what fictionalized movie, (called “THEM !!!”), that was based on the “alleged” event. The human death tolls were a bit lower in the movie, and the use of flame-throwers, rather than DDT, was over done, but it was just California, so who cares? So Hollywood makes a movie, “common ants mutate into giant man-eating monsters that threaten civilization” But I’m prohibited to talk about it?. Go figure.

    All I know is, every Christmas after that, all I got was clothes. Every Christmas, … clothes.


    • pANTIFArts says:

      On advice of counsel, I now claim the post above to be Russian Dis-Information, and will have no further comment on the matter.


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