As Joe Biden would say: “You know the thing!”
The non-essential gray lab coats at Blaska Policy Werkes are engaged in a work action. They refuse to report back to work here on the verdant campus of Blaska Work Farm and Penal Colony, citing fear of the coronavirus. Also something about “slave wages” and a “toxic work environment” (whatever that means), and “gray privilege.” They say they are making more on Nancy Pelosi’s unemployment relief than they can here.
In lieu of our customary original research, trenchant commentary, and idle speculation, we fill today’s space with content snagged off the Internet. (So it must be true!)
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It is a slow day in the small Wisconsin town of North Haybale. The streets are deserted. Times are tough, everybody is in debt and living on credit.
A tourist drives through town, stops at the motel, and lays a $100 bill on the desk saying he wants to inspect the rooms upstairs to pick one for the night. As soon as he walks upstairs, the motel owner grabs the bill and runs next door to pay his debt to the butcher.
The butcher takes the $100 and runs down the street to retire his debt to the pig farmer.
The pig farmer takes the $100 and heads off to pay his bill to his supplier, the co-op.
The guy at the co-op takes the $100 and runs to pay his debt to the local prostitute, who has also been facing hard times and has had to offer her services on credit.
The hooker rushes to the hotel and pays off her room bill with the hotel owner.
The hotel proprietor then places the $100 back on the counter so the traveler will not suspect anything.
At that moment, the traveler comes down the stairs, states that the rooms are not satisfactory, picks up the $100 bill and leaves.
No one produced anything. No one earned anything. However, the whole town is now out of debt and now looks to the future with a lot more optimism.
And that, dear reader, is how a government stimulus package works.
⇒ Ripped from today’s headlines: “Democrats, Republicans, no closer to a deal.”
Blaska’s Bottom Line: Sometimes no deal is better than a bad deal.