Notice to subscribers (and on-line surfers)

Good riddance to positive images

The board of directors of Blaska Policy Werkes (and Tanning Salon) met in special, emergency session via Zoom (saves on airfare and hotel expenses) to make a momentous decision and to hell with you, the reader.

You opinion machts nichts!

No, the Werkes is not charging subscription. We have not sold out to Mark Zuckerberg. (Private message us; we can negotiate). Nor have we thrown in with Madame Brenda to espouse communism instead of a democratic and meritocratic republic. Nothing so trivial.

The big reveal is that the Werkes is discontinuing its seldom-used and much despised official logo.  Eliminating it. Erasing it from the historical record. Expunging, purging, and shit-canning it. No longer will it grace your favorite conservative blogge — not that it has very often (but that is more due to negligence and incompetence on the part of our North Korean web designers).

Not even Blaska Policy Werkes (named after its founder and head groundskeeper) can swim upstream against the polluted currents of history. (We can’t even float downstream.) We follow the example of Aunt Jemima, the Land O’Lakes Indian maiden, and now Leinenkugel beer to move in lockstep with the prevailing conformity.

Worse, he’s SMILING!

HappyAvatar

Say goodbye to Willie Werkes

Willie Werkes, our now-discontinued logo, stereotyped white men as self-satisfied, well adjusted, eager to please. Where is the anger? The  shame? The guilt for 1619? Our icon’s positive demeanor and go-getter attitude is an affront to the suffering of all oppressed peoples (those being Blacks, Hispanics, LGBTQRST folk, women, students, and Nike spokesmen). Like the mainstream media said of the Covington Catholic high school kid, you just want to smack the him in the puss! 

⇒ Willie Werkes (pronounced “Vill he Verk?”) needs a good twerking followed by a beatdown from COVID-19-masked high school counsellors.

How to replace him? That may require years of study, as witness that NFL team from Washington formerly known as the “* * * skins.” (What’s wrong with “Washington Skins” — as in skins and shirts?) We can’t darken Willie’s epidermis. As the case of Uncle Ben’s Rice proves (don’t ask us why), Black people are verboten as the face of consumer goods. And White = Privilege. (How long can Betty Crocker hold out?)

Blaska’s Bottom Line: Now get off our case.

What should replace Willie as the new logo?

About David Blaska

Madison WI
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15 Responses to Notice to subscribers (and on-line surfers)

  1. Kevin S Wymore says:

    A stylized smiling face. Not an actual image of a human being, lest anyone, um, take offense.

    Nothing conveys the optimism of Blaskaville like a smile.

    Like

  2. pANTIFArts says:

    I Would commend you, BUT, as you are a cis-gendered, sanity-normalizing, member of the “Privileged Patriarchy that oppressively marginalizes the Rationally-Challenged community, IT IS NOT ENOUGH !! It will NEVER BE ENOUGH !!

    Liked by 1 person

    • pANTIFArts says:

      Replace him with an AMOEBA, they are NON-BINARY (sexism), COLORLESS (racism), PANSEXUAL (LGBTQxyz M-O-U-S-E ), etc… free of any “ism” known to SJW science. PLUS when you are exposed to them, they tend to go to your BRAIN.

      Liked by 2 people

  3. Batman says:

    I can already see the headline in one of the local rags tomorrow.

    Local Conservative Luminary Takes a Knee by Self-Cancelling.
    About the only accurate or worthwhile sentence in Dave’s entire post is:

    Like the mainstream media said of the Covington Catholic high school kid, you just want to smack him in the puss!
    Batman be missing that.

    Like

  4. Cornelius Gotchberg says:

    “What should replace Willie as the new logo?”

    The Gotch can’t make up his mind…THIS…or…THIS

    The Gotch

    Like

  5. georgessson says:

    Gotch, “This… or This…” might be construed as sexist… But as Smilin’ Bob Hope used ta say, “Thanks for the Mammories…”

    Like

    • Cornelius Gotchberg says:

      Perhaps; but for reasons that should be abundantly clear, better THOSE than THIS, am I right?

      The Gotch

      Like

      • georgessson says:

        Once again, Cornelious presents the un-arguable truth. BTW, this review of the way-beyond-sale-date donut joint was by a local patron:

        “They use to be so good, food is now sub par, burgers are half the size, they clearly don’t care anymore, sad deal. Taking advantage of tourists and the lack of food establishments.”

        Kinda sounds like his “sub par”, “half-size” & “sad deal” comments on this site….

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Ed says:

    Leinies no more. It was bad enough they took away the Red Lager, aka the better red. Then started adding all those damn other flavors. Now this.

    I am going back to Hamms and Old Style. Manly man beers.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. jimydandy says:

    Oh, the humanity!

    Like

  8. patrickmoloughlin says:

    Please tell me that Willie will not be denied unemployment compensation. Plus $600. Until December at least.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Gary Kriewald says:

    I suspect Willie’s canceling is due to all those rumors about his attending a toga party in blackface while a student at Podunk Tech back in the ’50s.

    Like

Comments are closed.