You know it’s cold outside when you go outside and it is cold.
No mail delivery. No school. No state government.
Blame the Orange Man for the government shutdown? We swear in Tony Evers as governor and one month later …
Leon’s drive-in, Milwaukee, is still serving frozen custard. Believe us, the custard IS frozen.
Walmart shoppers are advised to wear an extra pair of pajamas.
It is 50 degrees warmer in the Stately Manor refrigerator.
Grandpa’s teeth are chattering and they’re still in the Polident jar.
Due to the extreme cold and wind, the Madison Police Department is canceling all misdemeanor and felony criminal activities.
Criminals, please take note, it is too cold to commit crimes. Stay inside and read, watch Netflix, go on Madison Area Crime Stoppers and help catch other criminals, anything, but for the love of polar bears, do not go outside and commit crimes.
Blaska Policy Werkes 
30 responses to “How … cold … is it?”
🙂
LikeLike
Or, the old one: It’s SO cold out that lawyers have their hands in their OWN pockets!!
*badabing
LikeLike
@dad29;
Two minutes late…RATS!!
The Gotch
LikeLike
Broke the record for the lowest high temperature for January 30th with -10.
The previous record (-1) was set 68 years ago today, on the same day as the coldest [-37] temperature ever recorded in Madison.
NBC15 issued a 4 (severe) on its weather impact scale; a first.
The Top Ten List of “How Cold Is It?
# 10–My car won’t start running and my nose won’t stop.
# 9–Police don’t have to tell perps to freeze.
# 8–Instead of flashing, @richard lesiak is describing himself to people.
# 7–Saw an Amish guy buying an electric blanket.
# 6–Gangstas is pullin’ they pants up.
# 5–Folks are drinking hot sauce instead of coffee.
# 4–Ice cubes have goose bumps and are coming out of the faucet.
# 3–The lovely and long-suffering Mrs. Gotch is thankful for hot flashes
# 2–Stormy Daniels is keeping her clothes ON.
And the # 1 example of “How Cold Is It?”
@AnonyBob was seen with his hands in his OWN pockets.
Brrr!!!
The Gotch
LikeLike
Donald Trump is feeling the heat these days. So will Robin Vos the with the way Foxconn is burning wisconsin
LikeLike
Where are the jobs? Conned by Fox: Walker’s legacy, with Vos and Fitz in supporting roles. Think they sound defensive enough?
LikeLike
How much money has Foxxconn received from taxpayers? Anyone?
Its not like Solyndra is it?
LikeLike
splat:
How much you ask: $90 million in transportation funds originally budgeted for local road projects statewide. $Millions from the LUGs for infrastructure and real estate. $Millions more in administration.
If you want to whine about Solyndra, whine at GWB.
LikeLike
OB. Money. Spendable dollars. How many? Ya big LUG?
LikeLike
Why GWB? That was all Obama and his best and brightest shoveling megabucks to some well heeled Democrat bundlers. You don’t remember the photo ops just before Solyndra went tits up?
LikeLike
About 1/3 of the $4.5 Billion has no connection to the number of jobs created. Nice boondoggle courtesy of Walker, Vos and Fitz! Thank god I no longer pay Wisconsin taxes.
LikeLike
Abob:
Don’t confuse splat with those troublesome facts.
LikeLike
The best part is when Vos and company pulled that lame-duck BS they put the gop in charge of WEDC. Took over just in time for Foxconn to bend them over. Hilarious.
LikeLike
https://www.jsonline.com/story/news/2019/02/02/wisconsin-taxpayers-gave-foxconn-rich-subsidy-did-we-overpay/2742970002/
LikeLike
It’s so cold that Progressives are spending their own money.
LikeLike
Really? Ask Vos about the 14 EXTRA staff he hired at over a Million a year. Or; the OUT OF STATE ???? law firm he hired at 850 k plus expenses, etc. per year. A lot of people have stuffy noses this time of year, but they can still smell something rotten coming from Vos’s office.
LikeLike
Generally there’s a birth spike ~nine months hence after events that keep people indoors for days at a time.
A word of caution for morally lax, maniacally lascivious Lefties to wear protection and, fer the good cryin’ out loud, Stay_Away_From_The PIPE!!!
Brrr!!!
The Gotch
LikeLike
https://www.bizjournals.com/milwaukee/news/2019/01/30/foxconns-woo-assures-gov-evers-milwaukee-officials.html
But heaven forbid, you repeat anything but the initial breathless story (a la Covington Catholic)
Meanwhile, Bob, Bald, Everley and Lazy-ACK are cheering – YEAHHHH!!!! WISCONSIN IS LOSING JOBS!!! THAT’LL show those Republicans and that Walker (who in case you didn’t know, is no longer in power)!!! It’s called calculated risk – sometimes you’re wrong, sometimes you’re right – something not too many Dems know without ever had running a business. Evers is such a saint and so savvy, that he should have no problem cleaning up a mess if there is even a mess.
LikeLike
These aren’t lost jobs; they never existed. But it shows how good the GOP is at “spending other people’s money” (as y’all love to say) on for-profit business. A LOT of money for an inflated number of promised jobs. BILLIONS to a large but shady foreign business known for not following thru on expansion promises. All to shore up Walker and the GOP’s sorry job creation numbers for his re-election. This was campaign politics, not economic development and taxpayers are literally paying the cost. Thank god I no longer pay Wisconsin taxes. No one is cheering; those are outraged cries of “I told you so!”
LikeLike
Those jobs that never existed are back again. Whoops!
LikeLike
Where? Let us all know when those 13000 highly skilled manufacturing jobs are all filled.
LikeLike
@AnonyBob;
”No one is cheering; those are outraged cries of ‘I told you so!’ ”
Excuse me, I didn’t catch that?
Think The Donald did a Hopey Changey groveling bow?
Me either.
Ah Lefty; so MUCH suffocating ignominy, so little time!
The Gotch
LikeLike
A large multinational manufacturer reverses itself based on a call from Trump instead of market considerations? Don’t be so gullible.
LikeLike
But it reversed itself. Maybe Trump has the magic wand Obama wondered about.
LikeLike
All I know is what I see: a lot of guys building a big building. And a lot more people building needed improvements to I-94 from Chicago to Mke. We note the whining from Up Nort’ people who didn’t get their Free Money from eagle-shit this year. Yah, life is unfair and then you die.
LikeLike
retire
LikeLike
I’m thrilled that you’re happily paying high taxes. (I hope you’re in all Democrat governed Illinois.)
Remember our discussion about karma?
LikeLike
OB, the building and road improvements aren’t building themselves.
I guess they’re shovel ready.
LikeLike
LikeLike
And speaking of karma and taxes….. Gov Northam gets Kavanaughed and the Left howls for HIS scalp. Funny how demanding they are. Couldn’t happen to a better party.
Gov Cuomo has a $2.5B budget shortfall because the State and Local Tax Deduction has cost the wealthy some big bucks. Since NY and CA have their top 1% paying 40-50% of the states tax they are leaving. Voting with their feet. IL, NJ also hardest hit.
Trump! You magnificent bastard!
LikeLike